Monday, October 22, 2012

Free samples are the gateway to New Age Religion

After our trips to the gym, Addison and I usually stop in at the health food store next door. It's where we sometimes buy soy milk for a treat. And they have samples.

Addison lives for the samples. She expresses roughly the same amount of glee about samples as she does Disneyland. When she's being a pill about getting in the car for some reason, all we have to do is mention "Trader Joe's" and she flips emotions on a dime. She runs in circles shouting, "Yay! Trader Joe's! Samples! Trader Joe's! Hooray!" Which still makes it hard to get her in the car, but glee is better than belligerence.

We were in the health food store earlier this week, and Addison stood with great big puppy dog eyes right in front of the sample table, clasped her hands in front of her, and said, "Pwease!"

But it turned out she didn't like the dried kale chips the hippie lady behind the table was offering. She started to get pouty, and hippie lady couldn't take it and started rooting around in her pockets and came up with this:

That's right. She handed Addison a crystal. I was going to make Addison give it back, but it was awkward, and Addison was about to throw a fit, and the hippie lady seemed like she might start crying, so I just made Addison say thank you and we left. What I wanted to tell the lady was that she's gonna lose a lot of magical crystals to my little girl unless she ditches the kale chips and gets something with chocolate in it.