Friday, June 29, 2012

My wife and I are having a fight and we need YOUR help

See, it's like this:


We're not actually having a fight -- my wife prefers the term "parenting stand-off." And we need our readers to help us decide who's right. Lindsay and I have different perspectives on whether our toddler should be required to give hugs, particularly when it comes to bedtime, or saying goodbye, and particularly particularly when it comes to our daughter running screaming from my wife.

Lindsay posted on her blog soliciting feedback. Her post gives a little more detail, but I think mine gives the necessaries for you to make a parenting decision for us. You have so much power. Use it wisely. (Also, pick me.)


17 comments:

  1. Oh dear goodness. Someone is going to call Child Protective Services on me any minute now...

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  2. Ok, Neal, I'm actually siding with you on this one. I'll leave more details in my comment to Lindsay's post. (Since she gave more details in her post, she deserves a fuller comment.)

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    1. Although I'm pretty sure I won, I'm going to tell Lindsay it was a tie.

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  3. Ah ha. Just got where the quote came from. Very apropos. Has she watched it yet?

    On topic, I agree with you. I also have sympathy for Lindsay.

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    1. My wife gets the rough end of the stick (is that a phrase?) when it comes to our daughter's embraces. Addison loves to be chased, and that's how I get a lot of my hugs. But since Lindsay has some chronic health issues, chasing isn't so easy for her.

      As for one of the greatest movies of all time...no, we haven't gotten there yet. But I'm looking forward to it.

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  4. Uh pic number one wins. No means no.

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  5. So, just so everyone knows, my wife tallied the votes and posted a follow-up piece on her blog, here:

    http://llcall.wordpress.com/2012/07/03/the-votes-are-in/

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  6. Replies
    1. old moldy gizzards! Love my ailing ostriches!!!!

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  7. Jillsmo sent me here. And it turns out there's a quote from the best movie ever! Win!

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    1. Thanks for visiting! I cannot take credit for the best movie ever...this is just a tribute.

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  8. love the drawings! personally, i think mom and dad should give hugs and physical affection. all others back off if the id says no. i hate when people try to force my kid to hug them. I don't care if you're Grandma, Great Aunt Alice, or the Pope...back the heck off!

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  9. Replies
    1. Our Addison is a fickle one. Sometimes she's all about hugs and kisses with us, her parents, but mostly she refuses them at obvious moments like bedtime or leave-taking, which can be both a little hurtful and irritating. Do we teach her she can refuse us whenever she wants? Or that We have family routines that she needs to get behind? We still debate this.

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  10. I'm a caregiver to toddlers. Sometimes I ask a kid if he wants a hug ("he", because mostof them are little boys) but I would never force a kid to hug me. Forcing someone to hug you? Do you (not you, just anyone who forces hugs) even understand hugs?

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    1. Yeah, the thing with our kid is that she uses hugs manipulatively - she'll hug everyone except one person, just because she thinks it's funny. She's doing better now, though, since we let her choose between a night-time hug and a night-time kiss. Sometimes blowing kisses works too. She likes the choice.

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